“Can I help you?”

All I could hear was The Beatles song “Help, I need somebody…” ugh… Those four little words, “Can I help you?”- does it give anyone else anxiety? Oh, just me. cool.

Over the last couple of years of deep investigation, I’ve discovered that I am a caretaker by nature and pretty much by trade. So when I married a man with a potential debilitating disease, it wasn’t something that I feared going into. It just seemed, well, normal. In the last year there has been one important life lesson that I will continue to shout from the mountain top: LET PEOPLE HELP YOU!!! 

I thought that kindly responding “I’ll be okay” was the humble way to persevere through trials. I thought I was doing myself a favor and assumed that people just said those things because it’s the right thing to do when someone is going through a hard time. I would then find myself over and over again, crying out to God for help. Expressing directly to him just how exhausted, overwhelmed, anxious, and burdened I was. And you know what the key is? GOD USES PEOPLE TO HELP US. Sounds easy, right? Putting it into practice, not so easy! I felt like when people asked if they could make a meal, give a gift card, send a coffee or drop off groceries, it made me like it was out of pity. Yet again, another lie that Satan so delicately places to make us feel unworthy of God’s grace gifted through people. 

Thursday, September 19th, 2019 I had just come out of a meeting where I knew I needed to shift some things to help continue the healing I needed in my life. It was about 11:30 a.m. and we were going into our monthly staff connect. It was my first time back at a staff connect after maternity leave. As we entered the time of worship, I vividly remember whispering to myself “Naomi, now is not the time to cry, nor is i the place to break, clean yourself up.” There was a knot in my throat the size of a softball as I fought tears from streaming down my face. The worship team continued to sing and I felt a deep prompting of the Holy Spirit saying “there will never be a time or place where you cannot FREELY come as broken as you are”. 

DONE AND DONE.

That was all the permission I needed for the rest of my life to refuse to clean up what has already been covered by HIS GRACE, not my perfection. 

From that one encounter there was a significant shift that began to take place in my life; the gift of allowing people to help. 

If we do it with God, we will do it with people; attempt to clean ourselves up to a portrayal of “I’m good.” - Just as much as God desires to help us, often times his most used tool will be through people. 

Does it sometimes feel unnatural? YES. 

Does it sometimes bruise our pride? YES. 

Does it get awkward? YES.

We have all been in a season where we have needed help. There is nothing wrong or pitiful about that. You will also be in a season where you are able to be THE HELP. Maybe even the same type of help you once needed. God’s love for his people is grown and shown in the extension of our help. After my mom’s passing, I couldn’t even tell you which way was up. The morning of her funeral I couldn’t tell you the details of the day or what exactly took place in what order, but what I can tell you is who I saw. I saw women from our church dressed in their most colorful dresses standing and ready in place to greet those that walked in. I recall meals with love notes being delivered for almost a month, toys for our kids to keep them distracted, video messages, friends baking fresh desserts, I mean, the list goes on. Every single gift was wrapped in a bit of Jesus himself. Although it seemed small and insignificant to most, it was the cover I needed to be clothed in. The help from God that I was kindly gifted in earthly form. It’s the only way to describe how much love and generosity we were saturated in during that season. 

Letting people love you with help does not mean you’re less than, It means you’re cared for. 

Letting people see your struggles does not mean you’re weak, it means you’re cared for.

Letting people support you in a time of need does not mean you’ve failed, it means you’re cared for.

God cares for us by allowing others to care for us; the needs he meets are produced in the form of community. When we give permission to others for their help, we make room for a new type of depth in our relationships. Surface relationships are easy to maintain because they don’t require much clean up. When you want to hunker down and anchor in a friendship, let them help you. Now, there’s nothing wrong with either, but we build a resilience when we open ourselves up letting others help us. 

We need God, we need help, and we need people. 

God needs us to help the people in need. 

And we need to be the people who accept the help that God is sending. 

Need a coffee? Say yes

Need a hot meal so you can think? Say yes.

Need a few things from the grocery store? Say yes.

Need someone to watch your kids so you can at least shower? Say yes. 

You don’t do anyone a favor by denying a blessing. YOUR BLESSING AT THAT. 

Because there will come a day when you will be someones blessing.